How do I admit at the age of 47 that I still listen to a bully?
She appeared about six months ago. At first she just made a comment or two about my job performance. I was giving it my all to make the new endeavor a success. Her snide remarks were quite unnerving. Why couldn’t she simply encourage me? A kind word goes a long way.
Next came the biting remarks. “You make too many mistakes. Stop while you are ahead.” Wow! Was that necessary?
She began to dig in and make comments about my appearance. “I noticed the dimples on your legs. You might want to do something about that.” She began to focus on my physical appearance. Every day it was something new. “Hey, you have age spots on your neck. You might want to try some of that skin lightening cream.”
It has taken a while to get my belly full of the bullying. It stops now!
It’s time to shut her up and show a little love. That bully is none other than myself.
The voice of the bully can be brutal. It squashes dreams and keeps us from being the best that we can be. The best way to get rid of the negative voice is to practice self-love and compassion. Even though I know this, it can be a tall order at times.
When the bully appears, take the time to understand why and let it go. Fear comes in many forms.
The baker sat at his table one morning dreaming of the perfect cake. His coffee was percolating, just as loudly as his brain was, with ideas. He looked through his kitchen window and saw the dew drops nestled delicately on the flower petals in his garden. He felt inspired to walk outside and get a closer look at his prized peace rose-bush. The scent of freshness wafted through his nasal passages and he took a deep breath in. What a beautiful day it would be. He was inspired to create something extraordinary that would look, smell and taste delicious.
As he rummaged through his pantry he began to find the basic ingredients he would need for his special cake. He found baking powder, salt, flour, sugar, none of which sounded extraordinary to him. How would he make these things come together and become a masterpiece? As he pulled his mixing bowl out of the cabinet he thought about the process. He could create the mixture and stir it until it became a smooth liquid but that is as far as he could go. At first he felt troubled by his limitations and felt that he would not be able to carry out his masterpiece that day. Just as sadness set in, an idea began to take shape in his thoughts. What if…what if he involved something greater than himself to help him create the masterpiece? He realized that he had done his part. The mixture was poured into a glass pan and he handed it over to the Oven. The Oven lovingly accepted the mixture and began to work its magic. He watched through the window as the ingredients began to take a different form. The smell permeated his kitchen and once again he breathed in deeply and enjoyed the scent. Before his very eyes magic was taking place! The individual ingredients began to unify and rise into a single beautiful form. He was grateful to the Oven. In that moment he realized that he had let go and trusted the Oven to do its work. His raw ingredients had transformed into a beautiful cake.
When you have done all that you can do, let go and let the “Oven” in your life help you to transform the creation that you have in mind for yourself.
This story is dedicated to all of my friends who are creating their own “cakes”.